I enjoy shows that deal with revenge. The Count of Monte Cristo, Taken – any movies that involve a mission to rectify a wrong. When I watch these movies, I’ll be sitting at the edge of my seat, chewing my nails and hoping the badies get what they deserve.
I even took a liking to the TV series, Revenge. In the beginning, I could not miss an episode and then I started to repel the show. Enough was enough. It made me realise that sometimes revenge may feel great initially, but once you start, you may never be able to stop. The multiplication of evil is evil. Revenge can be blinding.
I have a high moral justice of wanting to ‘fix’ those that do wrong. It’s not about winning or seeing who has the last laugh. I want people who do the wrong thing to be hit with a big dose of karma – or at least watch as they suffer from the consequences of the evil they have perpetuated.
Except life isn’t always like that. We can’t always get revenge on those that do wrong by us or others. That’s why we have a justice system – no matter how flawed it can seem.
I’m sure many dads (and mums) have wished they could have done what Liam Neeson’s character did in the movie Taken. Except none of us are ex-CIA agents and have to rely on those in authority to make the wrongs right. In most cases there is no happy ending.
And such is the ending of the 60 Minutes debacle with Sally Faulkner. I wanted a real life Taken plot come to life. I don’t know all the sides of the story, but what I do know is there are two children in Beirut who will possibly no longer have contact with their mother. It’s heartbreaking. It would be heartbreaking if the tables were turned and they didn’t get to see their father. Dads are important too and I’ve heard of too many cases where mothers have stolen their children in spite of their partner.
I’ve had to question my own feelings around the story. Why do I not feel like the vast majority of Australians who believe the quest was wrong? Two wrongs don’t make a right do they? Had the mission been a success would the reaction have been the same? That it was wrong? Or would there have been congratulations sent to the mother and 60 minutes team on a successful retrieval?
As a result of the case which has piqued my interest, I’ve done some internal thinking about how I view life. I’ve found another area of my heart that God probably needs to work on. The issue of control and being impatient. I want injustices to be fixed NOW.
The news has reiterated one thing; how blessed my life is with the family I have. And it seems my girls are grateful too.
Last week I shared on Facebook this picture that Esther drew for me. When I picked her up from Prep, she told me that she had learned all about the world. After her bath that night, she went into her room and got busy drawing and colouring in. She came to me in the kitchen and gave me this picture of a world and said to me, “mummy this is you in the picture because you are my world. Happy Mother’s Day.”
Of course I got teary.
There are days where I think I could be a better mum. I’m definitely not perfect.
But in that moment of receiving that gorgeous picture, I realized that even with my flaws, Esther sees me as her world. I’m the one that is always there for her, I cook her meals, do her washing, sometimes makes her bed, plaits her hair, gives her treats, takes her shopping, takes her to church, drops her to school and picks her up. I’m in control of her world at the moment, and it’s a beautiful, but exhausting place to be. But I do it because I love her and her appreciation just makes me want to do more for her and her little sisters.
The picture also highlighted to me how all children see their parents as their world – no matter how good or bad the parent is. Which got me teary yet again about the Sally Faulkner case because her children will only experience one half of that world.