The day I rang a hater


I wasn’t sure how to title this post because after my phone call I realized the person wasn’t a hater, just a passionate sugar free foodie.

It was before Easter and Esther’s kindy was putting on a morning tea to celebrate Easter. The kindy has a strict lunchbox policy. No packet food or baking or biscuits or lollies and chocolate. The sugar treats were a given. I expected that. But the no packet food like a packet of healtheries chips or even crackers were a no no and even my baking had to be fruit only and that surprised me. But we work with it.

Anyway, the Easter morning tea could include those ‘sometimes’ foods. So I went and baked some gluten free cupcakes from a packet mix because I thought it would be safe that everything in that packet would be gluten free to ensure one of Esther’s friends could have a treat at the morning tea. I don’t like to see kids miss out because of their food intolerances.

I took a picture of the bunny paw print cupcakes I’d put together – although one kid said they looked like ‘dog paw prints actually’, and uploaded the pic to Instagram.

And I got hammered by a follower about whether they were sugar free and ‘eww you used a packet mix’ and insinuated that I was killing the kids for providing them with sugar loaded chocolate cupcakes.

I was kind of shocked by the attack. I didn’t know this person and something I had done as fun and to be a blessing to the kids was trodden on with negativity.

I thought about the comment and left it there. And then I did something really crazy and clicked through to see the owner of the Instagram account and saw that it wasn’t a troll but in fact another blogger based in Brisbane.

Her blog site was attached to her Instagram profile so I clicked through and her mobile number was on the page and I thought, I might just call you to find out where that comment came from.

So I rang her.

And the response was less than welcoming. I had called at a bad time and was told to ring at another time.

So I did.

But I got her message bank and left a message asking to call back to discuss the need for the comment.

I didn’t expect a phone call, but I was called and I was told to get over it, it’s social media and she didn’t care what people thought of her comment.

The point of my call was to let her know I didn’t appreciate it. I wasn’t sure if there would be an apology but there was none of that.

Unfortunately this blogger was so blinded by the cause she couldn’t see that the comment left on my photo reflected on her as a person and as a business owner and blogger.

Disagreeing with each other is part of life. I’m not always right and I don’t expect people to have the same opinions as me but I don’t go out and attack someone if I don’t agree with what they’ve done.

I wished it stopped there but more comments were made on the photo and I had to nip it in the bud and resolve the conversation positively. I’m not one to leave a situation with a negative response so I tried to wrap up the conversation by blessing her with a sugar free Easter and reminding her (and everyone else following our heated conversation on Instagram) that the real reason we celebrate Easter is because of what Jesus did on the cross and it’s certainly not about the sugar. And then I may have been convicted of stirring an ants nest when by grace I should have known better.

There were a few lessons I took away from the day I rang a hater debacle:

  1. If you leave a negative comment, you can be found and it can give a bad reflection on not only you as a person but your business.
  2. Don’t be blinded by your own campaign. If you want to teach awareness about a lifestyle that can help others, live it and show people how to do it, rather than attack people when they do something that doesn’t align with your standards.
  3. There is always a story behind a picture.
  4. Always extend grace. Be the better person if under attack. There’s no point losing emotional energy over someone who doesn’t agree with you. Reply with positivity.

My call to action may not have been very Christian. It was probably a bit ballsy and I was told that what I had done was bordering harassment. Fair call. I didn’t mean to harass, but it was so easy to click through to find a number and I like to talk about things rather than have a tennis match of hate comments.

How do you react when someone attacks you or something you’ve shown on Facebook? Ever had to make a difficult phone call? Is there anything that can be done to prevent negativity online?

I’m linking up with Essentially Jess for IBOT.