You Looked Different the Moment I Saw You

you looked different

Last Friday, I got lost in my thoughts as I pushed the pram and walked Esther to school.

We were running late. Again.

I am now known for my lateness at school because other mums will jibe me with being consistent (because I’m late) or expressions of shock and surprise when I’m early or on time.

Or I will be running really really late like I was last Friday and have one mum roll her eyes at me (in fun) that I was such a bad mum. Glad she doesn’t follow me on Instagram because she’d have found out I fed my younger two girls chips and a lollypop for breakfast-on-the-run. #mummyfail

Ugh! I will get myself together.

I told myself last week I would be more punctual. And then our new Kmart copper clock decided to slow down and tell the time 20 minutes too slow.

Anyway, as I was walking Esther to school last Friday, I got lost thinking about people I admired. They are specifically pastors at my church and I hold them in high esteem because they have their heart in the right place when it comes to people. I thought about why I admired them and had hoped that people would view me in the same light.

I then wondered if people saw me as someone who they could rely on and trust? Someone who they could come to if they were in need or needed a listening ear? Did I make myself available for others?

Right now I’d say I probably don’t look like the person I’d like to be. But thank goodness I’ve got time to change things around. And so I prayed that God would in fact teach me to slow down and to be ever mindful of others around me and I prayed that my life would be an example for others to live just as Jesus’s life was (and still is) an example to me.

I felt a bit disappointed in myself with the way I had let my own burdens become a priority in my life and I hadn’t spent more time looking out for others.

I was unhappy that I was known as the late mum. I’ve always been a punctual person. But I am also one of those people with a long to-do-list and will cram as many jobs in the time she has before she has to leave which incidentally makes me late – but at least I feel better that I got one or two jobs finished before leaving.

After I dropped Esther to class and as I walked down the path to go home, a lady who I’ve occasionally bumped into at school smiled and stopped to talk to me.

The first question out of her mouth before she said Hi was, ‘What church do you go to?’

I was surprised. How did she know I went to church when I didn’t even know her?

Funnily enough, she attended a local Baptist church and because I was friends with some of the people from that church on Facebook, she put two and two together and assumed I was also a church goer.

I told her what church I went to and she blew me away with what she said next.

“I knew you were a Christian the moment I saw you come to this school. There was something different about you.” She may have said something about the way I look at people and smile – but I can’t quite remember her exact wording because I was shocked with the irony of what I had been thinking about that morning and what she had just admitted.

How ironic I was thinking I wanted to look like someone who was different, and here was a lady whom I barely knew, confirming what I had thought I wasn’t.

For me, I’m not interested in looking different because I want to stand out. I want to be known as someone who makes the time for other people and someone who makes other people’s lives better. I can’t be this person by just being Bec. I can only be this person if I allow God’s spirit to live in me.

I admitted to this lovely mum that I’m not the perfect Christian but was greatly encouraged by what she told me.

And I’m still amazed with the conversation as I type about it now.

So this week’s challenge is to reflect on the type of person you want to be and pray for help in being that person to others. Most likely you are already that person. And if you’re not, thank goodness we have time to pray and change.

Ever been told you look different? Ever had a compliment that’s knocked you back because you’ve never seen yourself in that light?